Help Someone In Need

I’ve got a friend who has a sister who needs some help. The following is a letter by my friend.

Updated 2-23-10

Update to the update: things are gradually coming together.  Friends and family have kicked in so the remaining funds to be raised total is down to $550.  Child support still didn’t come through yet so she’s gotta call people and hear back tomorrow and probably go through more red tape to get him to pay what he owes.  I find it quite strange that she’s not allowed to recieve welfare as long as he claims he’s paying child support even though he’s not paying diddly.  (-.-)
But hey,there’s still that happier news that there’s only $550 to go, and if we can band together in the next few days (and if St. Vincent de Paul hopefully calls back) we can knock that out and get them moved into an affordable place where they can start rebuilding.

Update 2-22-10

This is (hopefully) the second to last update I’ll be making to this thread (as the update following it will hopefully be to say everything’s square). They’ve got a place lined up and if we can wrangle the money they can move in, no waiting list, just head on over. After funds raised thus far the remaining total to be accquired is $1200 ($700 if the child support comes through tomorrow, though as you may have discerned if he was reliable with the payments they’d have moved out a month ago). They’re also talking to their assorted parents and friends and family to try to cut down on that even more, as well as local charities. They’ve got employment sufficient to handle the monthly and are hunting for better jobs just in case, we’ve just gotta get over this first big hump.

Success here means self-sufficiency at long last. The kids won’t have to change schools, the family can all sleep under the same roof again, and they can finally start to try to rebuild. Keep us in your prayers, cross fingers/toes/eyes/etc. Again if you or someone you know wants to help you can contact my sister directly at tessafirebrand-at-aol.com via e-mail or instant message, or send donations via paypal at the same. Tell your friends, tell your family, tell your pet rock. Just a few helping hands can put us on the road to undoing the past destruction and rebuilding for the future.

Keeping the daughter safe with the mother is the relatively easy part of the equation, as she’s been the center of the mother’s whole world since the day she was born.  The ex, on the other hand, has been emotionally abusive towards both of them (and on rare occasions physically abusive towards the mother).  Though we don’t have the spare funds to get legal documentation proving it, the ex has also been sneaking into the yard at night, peeking into windows, and recently strangled the daughter’s kittens and left them to be found in their bed on the porch in the morning (alas, kitten autopsies to prove this are $300 per kitten).  He’s neglected her to the point that a little girl who quite literally wouldn’t hurt a fly now wishes he would just go away forever.
The house situation is a little trickier, but probably winnable.  He claims he moved out willingly and now wants it back because the house may be reclaimed by the bank soon.  What he and his lawyer neglect to mention is that he hasn’t paid a dime in months to support the kid or the house, and he was issued a no tresspassing order by the police when he was removed from the property for violent behavior, and that the family has been working dilligently to keep the kids fed and sheltered while he moved in with a new girlfriend because she was ‘easier’ than the responsibilities of a family.
He’s had plenty of opportunity to try to help the house and child in which he now suddenly feigns interest.  I don’t know for certain what he’s getting at, but it can’t be in the best interests of the daughter and I fear what would happen to her if he were to take her away.  The family keeps the house locked up at night worried that one of these nights he will try to break in and take the daughter or do who knows what else, and alas until he takes some violent action that can be proven without an expensive investigation they can’t get a restraining order.
We hope to be able to plant our feet and defeat him in court.  That’ll get the ball rolling on everything else to get this family into a safer home.  Just about everyone in the family has one or more jobs, so with time they can pay their bills.  There’s two ideal ways for this to happen:
a) Somewhere, somehow, come up with seven thousand dollars in thirty days to pay off the morgtage and show in court that they can indeed take care of the house and the family, showing the prosecution’s claims for the lies and slander they are.
b) Get enough money for an attorney to renegotiate the morgtage down from the current ‘7k or bust’ back to what their regular monthly payments were, which they can now afford at their current pay rates from their assorted jobs, and again showing the prosecution’s lies slander etc.
If we can defeat him in court, if truthfully being a more responsible and caring parent and truthfully making all efforts to pay the bills is enough to get the law on our side and keep him away, then we should hopefully be pretty close to having a stable family life again without worrying about the ex’s vendetta against my sister.
Naturally we don’t expect any one donation to cover the whole show, and we are already tapping local charities that are doing what they can.  A few bucks here and there will help pay for groceries to keep the kids fed, fill up the car to get to another job interview, or keep the phone and the ‘net on so she can continue her current work-from-home jobs (handy for taking care of the kids and providing for them financially at the same time).
If you would like to donate directly to my sister please send by paypal to tessafirebrand -at- aol.com.  If you’d also like to donate to the church folks so that they can keep helping her and others in similar situations, google the St. John the Evangelist parish in East Bridgewater, MA.  If all you can spare are prayers and well-wishings, we could use plenty of those too.
This post will be updated in the future as the situation develops, hopefully to say that we’ve emerged victorious and financially self-sufficient.  Thank you in advance for whatever you can do.

My sister is in a dire (but cautiously optimistic) situation.  Earlier today we went to court as her ex attempted to take her house and her daughter.  We’ve successively accquired a continuance to return on November 2nd (with legal counsel, God willing), but some tough times are between here and there.

Keeping the daughter safe with the mother is the relatively easy part of the equation, as she’s been the center of the mother’s whole world since the day she was born.  The ex, on the other hand, has been emotionally abusive towards both of them (and on rare occasions physically abusive towards the mother).  Though we don’t have the spare funds to get legal documentation proving it, the ex has also been sneaking into the yard at night, peeking into windows, and recently strangled the daughter’s kittens and left them to be found in their bed on the porch in the morning (alas, kitten autopsies to prove this are $300 per kitten).  He’s neglected her to the point that a little girl who quite literally wouldn’t hurt a fly now wishes he would just go away forever.

The house situation is a little trickier, but probably winnable.  He claims he moved out willingly and now wants it back because the house may be reclaimed by the bank soon.  What he and his lawyer neglect to mention is that he hasn’t paid a dime in months to support the kid or the house, and he was issued a no tresspassing order by the police when he was removed from the property for violent behavior, and that the family has been working dilligently to keep the kids fed and sheltered while he moved in with a new girlfriend because she was ‘easier’ than the responsibilities of a family.

He’s had plenty of opportunity to try to help the house and child in which he now suddenly feigns interest.  I don’t know for certain what he’s getting at, but it can’t be in the best interests of the daughter and I fear what would happen to her if he were to take her away.  The family keeps the house locked up at night worried that one of these nights he will try to break in and take the daughter or do who knows what else, and alas until he takes some violent action that can be proven without an expensive investigation they can’t get a restraining order.

We hope to be able to plant our feet and defeat him in court.  That’ll get the ball rolling on everything else to get this family into a safer home.  Just about everyone in the family has one or more jobs, so with time they can pay their bills.  There’s two ideal ways for this to happen:

a) Somewhere, somehow, come up with seven thousand dollars in thirty days to pay off the morgtage and show in court that they can indeed take care of the house and the family, showing the prosecution’s claims for the lies and slander they are.

b) Get enough money for an attorney to renegotiate the morgtage down from the current ‘7k or bust’ back to what their regular monthly payments were, which they can now afford at their current pay rates from their assorted jobs, and again showing the prosecution’s lies slander etc.

If we can defeat him in court, if truthfully being a more responsible and caring parent and truthfully making all efforts to pay the bills is enough to get the law on our side and keep him away, then we should hopefully be pretty close to having a stable family life again without worrying about the ex’s vendetta against my sister.

Naturally we don’t expect any one donation to cover the whole show, and we are already tapping local charities that are doing what they can.  A few bucks here and there will help pay for groceries to keep the kids fed, fill up the car to get to another job interview, or keep the phone and the ‘net on so she can continue her current work-from-home jobs (handy for taking care of the kids and providing for them financially at the same time).

If you would like to donate directly to my sister please send by paypal to tessafirebrand -at- aol.com.  If you’d also like to donate to the church folks so that they can keep helping her and others in similar situations, google the St. John the Evangelist parish in East Bridgewater, MA.  If all you can spare are prayers and well-wishings, we could use plenty of those too.

This post will be updated in the future as the situation develops, hopefully to say that we’ve emerged victorious and financially self-sufficient.  Thank you in advance for whatever you can do.

-Steve Y.

Please Paypal money directly to tessafirebrand -at- aol.com. Email the same with well wishing or questions. Send prayers directly to God.

UPDATE

The following is the latest update in one family’s ongoing quest for a safe and happy home.

For those just joining us, my sister recently went to court because her abusive ex is trying to take her house and her daughter.  He’s left her for some new gal pal and done virtually nothing to help pay the bills or take care of the kid, having given no support at all for the child in the past several months.  The court day was in the first week of November and we have yet to have a response.  Every day they jump when the phone rings, waiting for the verdict.  Until a decision is made they can’t migrate too far either.  Money is tight, and even with government aid and a lot of help from friends and family it’s difficult to keep the kids (three in all) fed and everything in the house turned on.
Right now there’s a lot of waiting.  Waiting for my sister’s job to give her more hours, waiting for a positive response to her new boyfriend’s job hunt to bear fruit, waiting for government assistance to come through, and most of all waiting for a court verdict and hoping that they get enough from the house settlement to start over somewhere.  A lot of waiting.
Any assistance that could be given would be greatly appreciated, great or small.  Even a few dollars could help to fill up the tank or cover another meal for the kids.  I can’t say for certain when this will be done and over with, as it largely depends on the court verdict and we don’t know how long they’re going to deliberate on the matter.  Please keep us in your prayers and spread the word to anyone who can lend a hand.  Thank you in advance for whatever you can do.
If you or someone you know would like to contribute, please send funds via PayPal to tessafirebrand -at- aol.com.  This page will be updated as the situation develops.